I promised to give you all the news of my recent trip to Hawaii, but frankly, I have been swamped with so much business, there hasn’t been time.

I also promised to share something with you about “giving to give”. Since this concept may help you, I’m giving it the priority.

One of the reasons I am so swamped is that I did just that: “gave to give”. In fact, that is what Hawaii was all about.

Here’s the story:

Even I experience some ups and downs in life. When I do, I use the tools that I apply to others, and I quickly find out why and remedy the situation.

About two months ago, I was experiencing a slump. I had been wanting to go do my volunteer work in Hawaii, but wasn’t sure it was such a wise idea to take off and do free work at that time.

I looked over my income statistics and found that when I do a lot of volunteer work, my personal income is always higher than when I don’t.

So, I decided not to worry about it and just go and give it my all, and that likely I would do better financially, too.

Well, that is exactly what happened. I just gave freely of my time and expertise, helped a lot of people, and, what do you know?

I’ve been flooded with paying customers!

Now, I don’t think it works as well if you are sitting around thinking about yourself and eagerly looking at what’s in it for you.

But honestly, maybe it works anyway. I would think that if you help, something good will probably come your way.

I have used this idea to help certain clients. When I have a client with a problem, I sometimes have them go help someone else with a similar problem.

I have a client who was dreading a family reunion because she had been snubbed and was not given much attention from her family. I advised her to find someone at the reunion who looked like they needed some attention, and to give some admiration and time to that person.

What do you know? She forgot all about her problem and felt just great for having helped another.

Interestingly, she then received a lot of attention from the family!

So, that is my hint for today.

Hope it helps.

Love,

Louise

I recommended that she invalidate his wrong action, without invalidating him.

I firmly believe that we are all basically good, and that bad behavior is actually not our nature. So, I told her to say, when he was being naughty: “That’s not my boy. I know my boy. My boy is nice”.

He’d been acting pretty awful that day. After our session she went home, and he was being mean to the cat. She did what I recommended, and the boy stopped hurting the cat and went off saying “Im a nice boy!” and was wonderful for the rest of the day.

This has been very successful with handling children and adults, too.

When you correct someone, you can target the bad action, not the person.

You can say to the child, (or co-worker, or husband or wife): “What you did was wrong”, or “That wasn’t OK”. “I love you, but it upsets me that you hit your brother.” “I know you are a good person, (child, husband, secretary, etc.., but that wasn’t the right thing to do”.

You will get a much better response and less tendency for the person to make errors, than if you tell them THEY are wrong, bad, etc.

Try it and let me know how it works for you.

Love,

Louise